How to Use Social Media for Meaningful Engagement

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Soojin Park
In a way we should all strive to be a positive influence. We should strive to influence the other women around us to love the Lord to love their local churches, the differences when you want to be an influencer, there’s so much internal pressure to curate certain type of content. And I think it’s really comes down to like your conscience right and what you desire in your heart. There’s like a key difference between having a positive influence for the kingdom versus being an influencer.

Blair Linne
Well, ladies, here we are, again, at Glo, our podcast from the gospel coalition Podcast Network. And you know, we’re for women from different parts of the world. And we’re here to talk again, about God’s work in our lives and ministries and around the globe. You guys know, I’m Blair Lynn. But for those who are listening, I’m Blair Lynn. And I’m here with my friends, I You should they Lopez, Sharon Dickens and Sujin Park. And we’re going to be talking about how we can wisely use social media as Christians Sujin and I are here and the way we live here in the United States. And social media in the United States is pretty all consuming. It shapes our political campaigns or trends, how we communicate with one another, what we buy what we watch. And we’ve seen, I think, in the last several years that it really has had a huge impact on the American church. Recently, the Gospel coalition released a book on social media called Social sanity and Insta world, edited by Sara Zylstra. She’s one of the contributors. And Melissa Krueger actually talks about our use of social media in this way, and I’m gonna quote her. Unfortunately, there’s no recipe for social media. Each person has different reasons for being online, and different reactions to what she encounters. An online article that sends one person into a fit of rage might be hardly noticed by someone else. A beautiful living room may invoke feelings of jealousy in one woman’s heart, while another woman might feel joy and inspiration at the same picture. As we engage on social media, we desperately need discernment. I like to define discernment as wisdom making a choice. Some women may choose not to use social media at all, some women may take breaks, some women may put limits on their phones to monitor their usage, we need a combination of knowledge, wisdom and experience to grow in our ability to choose what’s best for our own lives, while not expecting everyone else to come to the same conclusions, and quote. So as we start this discussion on social media, I kinda want to hear first from Sharon and IE Shia, since you guys are outside of the United States looking in. And just a reminder, for those listening, Sharon lives in Edinburgh, Scotland, and I used to live in Guatemala City, Guatemala, what does social media look like in your part of the world?

Aixa De Lopez
But what’s amazing is when you hear about the polarization and the usage, the time we spend on it, it cuts across so much alike. But I think it goes back to science, because it’s, you know, our brains are wired, basically the same. And so they people at social media engines know this in their science behind why we’re so addicted to it, and how it shapes us it might have some variables, but I do see, you know, teenagers obsessing about their looks the same way in every corner of the world. I see. Women panicked over, you know, this media scandal or this false news, whatever. Just the same. So it’s that’s weird in that sense, which so like,

Sharon Dickens
me, I would, I would definitely agree. I think that we use the same, the same apps, the same platforms, we’ve actually picked up. So it’s one of those things that I think is globalizing in the sense that even some of the turns of phrase we choose, are probably the same, whatever context we’re from. And so I do think that yeah, we probably are exactly the same same feature going on, like, the same thoughts are going on Google’s heads, like same Tech Talk video sounds been going on the same place. 15 times. Like, yeah, so yeah, similar, similar similar.

Blair Linne
And I don’t know, Sujin. Do you have any thoughts on just social media in general here in the United States? And,

Soojin Park
I mean, it’s just like what you said, I think it’s all consuming. I think, especially in the last couple of years, we’ve seen how much it drives people to different thoughts, beliefs, actions, and I’m sure we all have a lot to say about how it’s affecting the church as well.

Blair Linne
Absolutely. And I mean, we’re aware of the dangers even as we’ve talked about some of them, whether that’s teens and you know, their self image. We know there’s a rise in anxiety and depression and covet too. snares. I kind of want to highlight like some of the positives. I can we focus in on like, what are the what are the good things that you see when you engage in social media, specifically related to the church and good things happening?

Aixa De Lopez
Yeah, I can attest to that. We know the dangers, like we all know the dangers. But I have to say that my faith took a turn for the, you know, for the better. via Twitter, out of all places, you know, people really unusual, that’s unusual. I know. And I have to recognize the fact that it is a nude, sadly, it’s unusual. But it took the kindness of a stranger to actually start feeding me just encouragement, and that was hide on a balloon. Some of the TDC crowd might be familiar with his name. But he was kind to me over social media, he asked kind questions really, like genuine questions about where I was my faith. In, in Little by little, we became actual friends like, to the point where my family flew to the Dr. Last year, to be with their family. And so we’ve become, you know, family. And I know, that’s not like the ending to every story. But I have to, we have to remind each other, that it’s real people, we are engaging real people, and we cannot control everything that bombards us, but we can control what we contribute to the platforms. And in you know, never lose your humanity while using the the, if you’re if you choose to be on social media, be a person, be a sister, be a witness, you know, in everything you do, because I so much of what I do have and enjoy today, as a Christian came about because of a stranger being kind to me over Twitter.

Sharon Dickens
That is actually I mean, it’s sad in one way, because you had to go so far to few cabinets. And but it’s also amazing in another way, because there was doors that were opened that never would have been before. And one of the things that I’m not a big massive fan. I mean, we talked about this last night, and I’m not even going to hide it. Like I am like if someone wants to talk to me, come and see me. For me up. I don’t feel like we’re having real conversation when it’s on on Facebook. And but actually, there’s so much good, that’s there as well. So like Keisha says, I have to think about the mic, my example her my example in case or like being a decent human being in a good example, as a Christian, but actually, I’ve found social media really helpful for not only telling people about our ministry, but keeping in touch with the friends that we meet along the way. And so as part of 20 schemes, we bang into a lot of people, and they’re not there, they’re not all going to become great friends, but some of them have. And actually some of the ways that you keep in touch with their lives and see what’s going on through Instagram, watch the How their churches have evolved, or even celebrate. And when one of them I’ve been praying for and I’ve been seeking funding to find a church for a long time, and then watching their first service on a Sunday morning that that’s great. It’s a great way to engage with and keep those relationships alive in a different way. But it’s not the only way that you would do relationship.

Soojin Park
Yeah. And I think, despite the pitfalls of social media, one thing it does is it allows a global church to be more connected, right. And I think social media, it’s global by nature, we all share the same apps, but especially within the church, like I can follow a missionary halfway around the world and see how they’re doing in their ministry. And that’s something that wouldn’t be possible without, like, newsletters being mailed out months later in the past. Right. And so I do think there’s a lot of positives that come from the connection of the global church through social media as well.

Blair Linne
That’s good. And, you know, I think I’m reminded that not everyone has a thriving local community. So for some people, like being able to reach out to someone through social media, that’s kind of the only encouragement that they may have. You know, maybe there’s a few people in their community or in their local church serving the Lord, that they might actually really be encouraged right to follow someone. So what are your thoughts on this idea of being followed or being an influencer? Like, should we be striving to be influencers as Christians?

Aixa De Lopez
Yeah. So you hear more with young people today? I do hear like they want like that career choice, which is unfathomable to fathom mobile to me, because it’s It wasn’t an option like, I became when I guess, on accident, like, I have no idea. Well, we we I think generation didn’t have any idea of what was going to become with our social media platforms. And, you know, a lot of a lot of young guys just since they grew up watching that they want it by all’s I always warn them to about that, because you have to be really careful. What is it that you want, as a Christian, you should want the glory of God and to serve Him. And if he chooses to use your platform and grow it because he wants to organically that’s the his prerogative. But it’s not, it’s not something that you should actually desire. Because it’s really dangerous, any sort of limelight on you any sort of, you know, self made influence, it’s, it’s, it ends up being toxic, and you should really be careful. As someone that uses social media, I feel responsible, and we should not, you know, evade the responsibility, like, oh, no, everyone has a responsibility they should choose. No, I have a responsibility. And I choose to use the social media that God has allowed me to grow, to point to himself into the local church, I don’t want to be a substitute for real community for real counseling for real church attendance. And so when what you were saying about connection, global church, whenever a person feels so desperate, that they would come to me via inbox, it’s heartbreaking for me. And I can’t tell you that a week goes by without a woman, opening her heart to me, via DMS. And that’s so sad. But what I do is, by the grace of God, you have a network of churches, you have a network of sisters all over Latin America for me. And I ask some questions and say, I am not capable of you know, walking with you, and I don’t live near you. So if you’re comfortable, would you allow me to connect you to a sister this near you. And I’ve done that over the years, and it is so warm and fantastic to just learn about how they have found somebody in their hometown or in their country, even if they’re far away. So we should not want the platform, we should want advance the kingdom.

Soojin Park
And I think that’s there’s like a key difference between having a positive influence for the kingdom versus being an influencer. And I think it’s really comes down to like your conscience, right, and what you desire in your heart. And I think, you know, we talked a little bit about this in our previous conversations on our own about how, in a way, we should all strive to be a positive influence, we should strive to influence the other women around us to love the Lord to love it local churches, but I feel like the difference is when you want to be an influencer, there’s so much internal pressure to curate certain type of content, there’s so much pressure to curate an image for yourself that goes beyond just pointing to the Gospel. And so I think I do see a lot of Christian women who, when they start receiving a certain amount of following on Instagram, or Twitter, whatever, I think it’s really hard not to get into that pressure and temptation to want to turn yourself into somebody more than just pointing to Christ in the work that you do. And so I feel like it’s really like a hard question, you have to ask yourself very honestly, what is it that you desire? Or what’s masked behind your intent? Like, what is the true intention behind what you’re doing? And I think, I also think you need accountability. You need people in your life, who are willing to ask the hard questions of, hey, you’re starting to have this following like, Is this more about your platform? Or is this more about God? And I think that’s really important, or else, you really just gotta get in your head.

Blair Linne
I am reminded of the proverb which says, The Crucible for silver the furnace for gold, and man is weighed by the praise he receives. And I agree. So Jen, I don’t think that we were made to be able to receive this type of praise. And even under the likes of a you know, it’s like, we really do have to be careful, we really do have to guard our hearts. Because I think it can set us up for pride. I think it can set us up, where we may even start off saying this is about the glory of God, but then we find ourselves shifting, because he does sometimes other people respond to us. You know, you keep hearing like, Oh, you’re so Wonderful Oh, you’re so godly Oh, you’re virtuous woman? Oh, you know, and you have to keep your mind on straight. You say Okay, Lord, well, who do you say I am? You know, who do you say I am? And who and who am I in relation to you? Oh God, not the praise that I’m receiving all the glory must go back to God.

Aixa De Lopez
And also, do they have a community are real? You know, like what you said, Sharon, about who do you meet with face to face, who who’s your pastor, who’s pastoring you who’s, you know, who sees your flaws up close? I think that is pivotal. If you want to function in social media needs to be an overflow of your real life. You know, it, it shouldn’t be a production, it should be an extension. And, and a part of what you want to be made be made public, but not a facade, not a not a version of yourself, that it’s not real. I don’t show everything about my life in my public spaces. But what I show is real is part of who I am. And I’ve bound to take, you know, for example, my Instagram account, I’ve been approached by people who want to pay for advertisement in my in stuff. And I’ve made the decision to know because I respect the people. You know, I my books are about suffering, and basically adoption, adoption Christ, and they come to me with serious things that I’m not going to show up, you’re selling you something, and just be dissonant in that space. So I remember that it’s real people. A friend of mine, who’s anomala actually taught me to pray over the people who follow me, and to pray for how I serve those people. I think that brings it to another level of humbleness and up realness that I do need.

Soojin Park
Be but you know, on the flip side of that is, as we strive to remember that the people who follow us are real people, I think what we forget is often I mean, I have a prime, I only have a private Instagram page, I haven’t gone public, and maybe I’ll change my mind one day, but as of today, I think one of the main reasons I kept it private was I think, often the people on the other side, forget you’re human. It doesn’t necessarily go both ways. And one thing I’ve realized being in this ministry position that’s more public, you know, doing speaking and writing is that there’s ironically, this almost like dehumanization, that happens in ministry where people see you, and they forget that you are human and need grace as well. And the more people in your life that see you that way, versus the people who know you just for you, you’re you know, with all your flaws, I think it’s it’s really hard to like, like you said, your have your head on straight and, and what uh, that’s kind of like my personal reasons for not having the public pages. I think when you develop following online, you have to always remember that, that’s kind of a risk you take, right is that the people who follow you will not always see you as human. And so there’s more of that responsibility. And there’s more of that separation and distance that you have to intentionally play so that you don’t get so affected by the things that people are saying and expecting of you as well

Sharon Dickens
preach. And I think so, I was just thinking, some of the time we we do our thinking after the event. And so the It’s my mom would say you can like shut the gate after the horses bullied. And the reality is we we get ourselves so far gone. And it’s hard to draw yourself back. And so when we were sitting thinking through how we we did social media media with our ministry, meaning like you my stuff’s private, I don’t really unless I know you. And I’ve met you and I know whose face it is. You’re not being one of my friends. But actually, is I feel a protection and the fact that when it comes to the public persona of our ministry, it’s the ministry that’s there. So it’s not down to So 20 schemes, women’s ministries, not just don’t to me, we have a group of those. And I feel it that accountability that you were talking about the that that depth that we get from Sunday, just like sometimes I’m challenging your prayed or mocking you because you need it, or even just bringing out a bit of truth and saying actually what they were saying it wasn’t real, that that protection of the minister was a decision that we made. And then it’s much easier to promote something that’s, that’s not a person. It’s not it’s not reliant on one person. There’s actually a team. It’s not about one, and it’s very purposeful in the way that we’ve done everything, and particularly 20 schemes, women, and I love

Blair Linne
that word that use purposeful. And I think actually, that’s a good place to start for anyone who’s thinking about social media is what is your purpose? Like? Why are you choosing to be on the particular platform? Because we all may have different goals in mind. So for us, we may be thinking about ministry, someone else might be thinking about this as a job, what if they do make candles or you know what I’m saying? And they want to sell those candles? It may be nothing wrong with taking those advertisements, right? So it’s like, what is your or you just may want to post pictures about your kids or dogs or whales? I mean, I don’t know, you know, whatever. You know, so but yeah, knowing what is the purpose? Why are you there. And then you can stay focus on your calling, you know, what the Lord has called you to.

Soojin Park
And I think that’s really important to bring up too, and that not all Christian women have to be Christian influencers on social media. Like for me, I just want to post pictures of my dog, my meals that I’m eating, let’s see pictures of my friends, which is why I’ve purposely decided not to be public. And I think that’s okay. And I think just to release other Christian women from this pressure of having to have this persona or be the super influential person online, you don’t have to do that. Not everyone is called to us space.

Aixa De Lopez
I love that you made that. You caveat in that. I love that, because it’s very nuanced. And it’s personal as everything else in your walk with Christ. It’s personal. And like I mentioned, I, you know, I never set out to be this, it just came out. And then I wrote a couple of books and just people gravitate toward whatever it is that you’re you’re saying. And so it becomes this. And so I’ve learned how to manage it, or I’m learning how to manage it as I go. But if you want, if you want this, just be purposeful, and be objective. And and it’s so important that that to know that everything we do in life is worship, we have to remember that whether you are you know, on a on a desk, because you’re a secretary or because you’re you’re a doctor, you’re a teacher, it’s just different kinds of ministry. But we’re all serving God all the time. And there is

Sharon Dickens
a tendency within us because we’re sinful to turn into someone who likes to be worshipped. Yes. I mean, it’s nice having people saying nice things about you. And it’s hard not to me, it’s hard not to listen to that. And that’s where good accountability comes in. But it’s also hard to listen to the things that are not so nice, that have been said by or, and so I, this a personal this, I don’t engage with any of it so nicer. No, if they’re on our I don’t want to know what they’ve said, when we post something on a blog, and it should apply to one of the teammates that because it’s not good for my soul. Like if it was, somebody’s giving me praise, that would not be good for my soul. But also, if it’s somewhere in where they’re just to attack or make a point or something, I don’t need to dwell on it that

Blair Linne
makes me think about back to Melissa’s, what I quoted at the very beginning, when she was saying like, it really is personal, you know, for one, you know, you may be able to be on social media all the time for another, you may create some boundaries. And I guess, you know, my last question is, what would it look like? If you do need to create more boundaries? If you do need to say, I need to take a break? Well, how do you think do that even whether that’s, you know, caring for another sister, who you may observe who’s on social media quite often? How could you encourage her if she needs to take a

Aixa De Lopez
break? I think it comes down to how you function in real life. If you’re being if you’re stumbling in in the way you go about your day, if it’s consuming more attention than it should, and, you know, you linger way too much, which I think all of us at one point have, then you need to push back and and say okay, this is not healthy, or this is dangerous, or this is not good for my soul. And sometimes you have blind spots. And we all need help in that. I think

Sharon Dickens
the so we have a process where we do one to one and accountability and one of the questions is always Is there anything that’s been more important to you than God? I miss first question, but we all say no. But if you start backwards at first, like question 17 and work your way forward. There’s a whole series of questions that show you what’s more important to you and God. And so when it comes to a 10 minute quiet time versus an anode and a half skimming to Instagram, their nurse, a misbalance. there that needs to be addressed. And if you have someone that’s constantly, not every moment, but is a regular part of your life and is intentional, like we were talking about in the last episode of hospitality, someone who is intentionally speaking into your life, asking those questions, is as you use on social media or proclaiming Christ or yourself, like, how are you into engaging with people? When you’re talking to them on Facebook? Who is it that you are representing? Because if it’s yourself and not Jesus, there’s something wrong. But then also, are you spending far too much time? If I’ve spent an hour and a half scrolling through Instagram, looking at all the little videos, and I’ve only like, look to the Bible for 10 minutes, then I need to re address my life. And so for me, I think those constant questions of having someone intentionally in your life, where you give permission to ask the things, so for some people, it’s not an issue. But for people who know it is giving them the permission to ask the hard questions is a really helpful way to go about

Blair Linne
it. How do you encourage because I imagine it’s not a one to one, it’s not like, man, I’ve been scrolling for an hour. I haven’t spent time in the Word. But I will get into work. How do you? How do you encourage someone’s love for Jesus so much that they want to spend time with him? Rather than spend time on social media? Yeah, I mean, because I think like some people can create laws, they can create rules. Yeah, I’ve been on social media. 10 minutes, I need to be in the word 10 minutes, you know what I mean?

Sharon Dickens
So if I did, if I do 10 minutes and required to write then I get on Instagram, you know, it’s kind of, I mean, everybody knows their hearts. I mean, we pretend we don’t. But we lie to ourselves all the time. And the truth is, for some of us, it’s not an issue. And for me, I struggle because I am entertained by the it’s not the video, it’s the the diversion of it. And so it’s like a checkout for however, 55 minutes, it is much not good for me, because it’s, it’s just not helpful. We deal with anything that’s going on. And so I know that about myself. And I’ve tried all the things that are legalistic, of pure like a little thing on your phone, where it says at nine o’clock, you’ve got to turn off on your, your social media, and you can just click a button, and then it comes back when again, there’s no real hard change there. But my pray with one of my kiddos every week and the the prayers exactly the same, I probably say this prayer, like every time I sit down, we when we get out, I pray that God will help me to love him more, love myself less and love other people better. And I think until I readdressing realign my heart to his head in the right direction, I’m always just going to be pressing Yes, to continue. Me it needs to be real hard, it needs to be a drive. And the only way that that’s happening is if I go to God and ask Him to change me. And so wherever it is, some of us it’s social media, some of us it’s like Netflix, some of us it’s like, it could even be really good books, wherever it is like is that the heart change can only be transformed by a repentant heart before God.

Soojin Park
And I think especially for women, like you’re not going to know you need a heart change unless you know that this thing is causing you to sin. Right. So I think just simple easy question is, is my usage of social media causing me to sin? And I think a lot of women, if they’re honest with themselves would say yes, particularly in the area of covetousness, right? Like, I can’t even imagine how many women are constantly being bombarded with the images, the fake images of lives of other women, and they’re always asking, why can I have that? Or what, you know, how do I accomplish that? And I think it affects people a lot more than they recognize, especially, you know, we always talk about how young teens are affected by it. But I think older women don’t recognize how much it shapes their perception of themselves and their own lives and how it makes them less content. It makes them discontent with their own lives. And so I just think simple question is, is this causing me to sin? And in what way? And if yes, like, maybe that’s it’s time for a break? Yeah.

Blair Linne
Thank you, ladies.

Soojin Park
We know we have our favorite question to close out each episode, which is shining a light on our differences. And so I wanted to ask you all not that we’re promoting over usage of social media. But what is a your favorite app on your phone right now? Sharon, you want to share first

Sharon Dickens
Mine would be a model of Instagram. And I do like pictures. But actually, it’s one of the few platforms that my brother will use. And so my brothers in South Africa and it’s a long way away, and he’s a typical guy. He just won’t send you images. But he doesn’t document his life all the time. But you get glimpses of light walk restaurant is gone to how the kids are doing. And through Instagrams. I love it for that. It says like our family album of all the people that I like to see. So yes My fave,

Aixa De Lopez
I’d say it’s between Twitter and Instagram. And I know Twitter has a bad rap. It’s like, a lot of people are pulling out because of the fighting and stuff. But I don’t know why I don’t feel like it’s that maybe it’s the guys that I follow or how I just go in and out in in just, you know, you write your ideas and they’re short, it’s I don’t know, I find it really helpful that people that I follow, so I love jumping on there in scrolling through just big ideas in small space in some links that are helpful. So I like I like it a lot. Like I keep liking it. So don’t hate me.

Sharon Dickens
I’m not a massive Twitter fan. I wouldn’t even know how to do tweet, you might need to show me. Sure.

Blair Linne
I would say it’s funny. Probably my favorite would be Instagram. I don’t post all the time. But I enjoy the engagement like being able to talk to people and have conversation regarding the things that I post. But I was thinking if you were to ask my husband, he probably would say Amazon would be my favorite. Because I buy too much stuff. Too many boxes coming to the front door. So that’s my confession.

Soojin Park
I’m probably the same, probably Instagram and Amazon.

Aixa De Lopez
If I lived over here, target

Soojin Park
the target app. You could sprinkle in a little bit of YouTube.

Aixa De Lopez
Yes, absolutely. Well, it’s been so good to chat again and just refresh our hearts and look to Jesus to help us in this very real dilemma of the of the age. And so we thank you for listening, and we hope to have you again at the globe, podcast and remember you are the light of the world. A city that is set upon a hill shall not be hidden. Neither do men light a candle and put it under a basket button, a light stand and it gives light to all who are in the house in the same way. Let your light shine before others so that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven. We hope you join us next time.