Social Sanity Book Club Chapter 7: Reclaiming Your Time

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Sarah Zylstra
Hello, and welcome back to our book discussion of social sanity in an Insta world. I am Sarah Zylstra. And I am joined here with Ana who wrote our seventh chapter, which is about rhythms. And I’m so excited to talk to you because of all the problems we have with social media. We did this survey of 1500 women and the number one issue women have is that they feel like they’re wasting their time on social media like that icky feeling after you’ve been scrolling for a while, and you kind of come to yourself and you’re like, what have I been doing? How much time have I been on here? Gosh, that gets us, doesn’t it?

Ana Avila
Yes, yes. This doesn’t surprise me at all.

Sarah Zylstra
Yeah. So I was wondering if you could tell me if we could back that up a little bit. And you could tell me, when did you first get social media? Do you remember your first account? And what was that like?

Ana Avila
Well, I remember I joined Twitter in 2011. I didn’t know how to use Twitter in 2011. Nor in 2012, I was going back through tweets. And I was just texting publicly basically, that I think that was the first thing I got, maybe I got a Facebook, but I don’t know, I’ve had several Facebook accounts. And I don’t use any of them. So I don’t know. But Twitter is the one that that comes to me first. And then Instagram, I was first obsessed with Twitter, after I learned how to use it. I just was amazed with the exchange of ideas that I could meet just anyone in the world who had an interesting thought and learn from them, or hear about things that were happening in real time on the other side of the world. So that fascinated me. And I became obsessed with Twitter. In fact, I got my job up quite simple on paleo, the Spanish speaking sister of the gospel coalition, because of Twitter, because I was just sharing my stuff there. And I found Haidle. And the people I work with a Coliseum. So that was interesting. And I’m very grateful for Twitter.

Sarah Zylstra
Yeah, I think a lot of connections get made there, right? There’s just like a huge amount of opportunities. And if you kind of look at it that way, it’s really time saving, like you can make connections on Twitter that would take you years to make in real life, or to go through like a phone or a longer system. But to just sort of get a feel for somebody or to make those connections online. That can be a pretty quick, quick way to meet somebody and kind of get a feel for them. Definitely. Yeah, that’s good. When did when was it as you got obsessed with your social media? At what point did you start to think? Hmm, maybe this isn’t all sunshine and roses?

Ana Avila
Yeah, I remember reading a book called irresistible by Adam alter, I think the author Skald. This was in 2017. I think. And I know, I don’t know, the author speaks of how some apps are designed to just be addictive. Like, it talked about psychology and how, like the things that we’re using casinos to hook people into just gambling and playing. We’re using social media. And I was like, Okay, this is scary. And I was just very into productivity. I love productivity. And I was reading people that wrote about productivity. And then they started talking about social meeting, how how much time we were spending there. So it just naturally I started to pay more attention to okay, yes, I’m spending too much time here. And then in 2018, I had my first child, and then it hit me like, Oh, my God, what did I do with that much time, but I have to now spend with this little boy. So yeah, in 2017 to 2018, I was like, really, really being confronted by the reality of the amount of time they spent there. And I decided to make some changes.

Sarah Zylstra
Yeah. Oh, that’s good. You’re not alone. We have all, as I said, have those moments of like, what, how much time did I really spend on here? In fact, 75% of women who responded to our survey said they check in several times a day. And I can totally relate to that of like, going back over and over again. Like now I’m a little bit bored. or Now I reached a point in my work where I’m kind of, you know, looking around a little bit instead of staring out the window, maybe now I’m staring at my phone. Why, what is it? Why can’t we just quit doing that? Like, you know, why can’t we just be super productive and zoned in on what we should be? And why can’t we go to social media and pop in like it should be used and scroll on there maybe a little bit and then be able to get back off?

Ana Avila
I don’t think we realize the amount of brain power intelligence and money that is being spent to the sign that this thing’s to be adaptive. I don’t think we realize and people started to talk a little bit about it last year, maybe with the social Will dilemma documentary think. But I don’t think we take it very seriously the amount of energy of effort that is put into this design for it to be actually addictive, and how, how fragile our psychology is, in a lot of ways, and how very, very specific things can just derail us. So we need to, I don’t know, take more seriously with the things that these people in social media take seriously, because they are actually studying every move we make, and tweaking everything to present it in a way just right for us. So we are there and every click, every tap, every swipe is just data that we give them on how to keep us hooked. If we if we, for example, in a video, we we log out or we close the app, they see, okay, this video made her look away. So I need to show her less of these and more of that. And the next time you go is a little bit better in keeping you hooked. So I don’t think we understand like the the amount of energy that is spent there. And we don’t spend nearly as much energy in just putting limits and and trying to stop depending on our willpower to just look away. Because that’s when we do we say, Oh, yes, I want to use Instagram less, I’m going to use it less. And that’s that fixed? No. We don’t make any changes. And we are wondering, oh, why I can’t wait, can I do it? Well, because you’re spending just point 000 1% of the effort they they are spending in keeping you there. So it shouldn’t surprise us, it turns of prices. They’re smart people. They’re very smart people and very wealthy people that are making a lot of money with our attention. Our attention is very, very valuable. And they know that. But we just give it away in at night. I like to ask people if they charge you for for being on Instagram by the minute, will you would you be there the same amount of time you are. And of course most people wouldn’t. But but we don’t value our time and our attention as much as we value our money. And that’s unfortunately too. And that’s one of the things I try to do. I try to remember, remind myself, how valuable my time and my attention is, and stop just giving it away and and just just just like I create a spreadsheet with expenses of demand than just trying to take care of my money. I have to make a plan and develop strategies. So my attention and my time are not just wasted away.

Sarah Zylstra
I think that’s really good. I love the idea of comparing it to money. And how much would you pay to be on here because it feels free? Everything about it feels so free? Like, who cares? This is just yeah, you’re right. We just don’t put any effort or or thought into how to combat that. And I don’t even really know, I’m excited to ask you about like, what would that be? What would be a strategy that would combat somebody else’s money and time and a team of people working to keep you on there and watching when you click off a video. And when you slow down as you’re scrolling past something, and what you maybe add you click on so they can give you a bunch more of those? What could a person who’s who doesn’t have a team of SEO experts possibly do to fight that?

Ana Avila
Well, I would just start by asking myself, why do I want to be there? To be honest, why do I want to be there? And if we just stop ourselves and try to come up with reasons, a lot of the time we’re gonna we’re gonna realize okay, I don’t need to be there in most of social media because because we don’t need to be on every platform, but it’s like can a habit Oh, tick tock is cool now. So I might as well just get an account and see what’s going on in there. We don’t do research on what is tick tock, what is it for? Do I need it? Does it serve a different purpose than another social media app? Is? Is fulfilling for me? I don’t know. So just sitting down and trying to figure out okay, why do I use what do we use Instagram for or Facebook or Twitter? And try to Okay, narrow down. These are the tools that are helping me to accomplish different goals in my life or that servi Teresa some purpose. Okay, now you have that answer and and then you can ask, okay, if I want to use I don’t know, Twitter to keep up with colleagues that live far away. Okay. How would you use it to to actually fulfill that purpose, not just randomly scrolling but actually want to be seeking people and commenting and liking their stuff and, and I don’t know, sharing the stuff I’m writing. And then you start using social media with a purpose and you set up boundaries, okay? I don’t need to be there five times a week, six, seven times a week, I just need, like, twice a week, maybe Mondays and Fridays. And then you put the boundaries, you need to actually to actually stop using it the rest of the week. And in what to do? Well, that would depend on you. I know people that just logging off the account on their phone. And when they try to automatically just a tap on Instagram, they see, okay, I’m locked off. Yeah, I shouldn’t be using it right now. And that’s it. And that those people are, I don’t know, they have a gift of the Holy Spirit. I’m not one of the one of those people, I just I have to delete the app from my phone. And that’s what I actually do. I decided this year, I would only use Instagram Fridays and Saturdays. So the rest of the week, it’s not on my phone. I know people that go even further, I know people that have given their passwords to a spouse or a very close friend for for them not to be able to download apps or to log into their accounts. Not unless they have like permission, or they’re just given the password by a friend or, or a spouse. And that’s that might sound dramatic to some people. But I don’t think it is I don’t think it is at all. If you value your time, if you value your attention, if you know this thing is sucking the life out of you. You shouldn’t you shouldn’t be ashamed to put more strict boundaries are the things you need to just walk in holiness and use the time the way God intends us to use the time.

Sarah Zylstra
Yeah. Talk to me about how you picked Instagram. Is that the only platform you’re on right now? Like, how did you? Did you go through that process of like, what do I need? And that’s when you got rid of Facebook and Twitter? Or like, how did you narrow that down? Why did you land on Instagram?

Ana Avila
I’m on Instagram, and I’m on Twitter. And I have a YouTube channel. So no, I’m not only on Instagram, I started on Twitter, because I’m a woman of words. I like to say I just love writing. And Twitter is a great tool for like, just experimenting with words and see how people react. And actually my, my book, I just I just started with tweets. And then they became articles. And then and then it became a book because I like to just test the ideas through Twitter. But I realized that I I didn’t need to be on Twitter to do that. I could just use a tool like buffer that just scheduled tweets, and I just write my thoughts in a tweet like manner. And then I scheduled them and they’re out into the world. And I check Twitter once a week. And that’s enough. So that’s my lover. And it’d be because yeah, Twitter was one of the like, I just spent a lot of time and he provokes a lot of anxiety, just to be aware of what everyone is saying all the time. It just became too too much for me, like emotionally more than just the time. Now Instagram, I, I found it was the best place for community. I have a book. So I wanted to build an audience of people that cared about the things I wrote about. So people on Instagram, which are just nicer, they’re just nicer. And I don’t know if they’re from you seen people that are or

Unknown Speaker
the medium changes as it changes the message. Yeah, that’s a good word. Yeah.

Ana Avila
So I don’t know the fact of seeing people at least a photo and video, I know it feels more human. And people are nicer. It’s just the truth. Um, so I use Instagram to share my work in general, but yet to have this more, more like in real time contact with the readers. I love to do live streams and things like that. And people enjoy it. And I do too. And then, well, I have those two in YouTube. YouTube is tricky, because it is sort of a social media because the algorithm is just, it’s hypnotic. And you could you can just be there forever. And I actually have very strict limits with YouTube. I used to only use it when I was on the elliptical, limited machine, you’re exercising. Now I only use it on Sundays. Sunday is my day of rest so I can watch silly YouTube videos. But now, during the work week, it just it’s just too dangerous for me to go into YouTube. And I just And when I’m doing like other things, just posting my videos and commenting I do it all through the back end of YouTube. So I don’t I’m not in, in like the, the feed, where I’m receiving videos to watch. So it just revolves a lot on my author work, I don’t use social media as a personal tool, I’ve decided that. And a few years ago, I used to I used to, like most people just share what I was eating, share pictures of my children. But I decided that I want I wanted to share that with only my close family and friends. And I have like instant messaging to do that I don’t need to post it online.

Sarah Zylstra
That’s really interesting, because most people don’t have a book or a podcast or something that they’re trying to get out to the world. So most people at least in responding to our survey, most women said, The reason they’re on is to connect with family and friends, and to kind of keep up with other people. But I think they could do sort of what you’re doing, if you just kept your circle small. I imagine it’s a totally different dynamic. If you have, you know, 200 people that you’re friends with, versus 2000 people that you’re friends with, that’s a different dynamic for you. And probably a different time

Ana Avila
than 200 people, that’s too many. We are not built to connect and keep up with 200 people that’s just not realistic. And social media, this is the thing of the social media, it it gives us the illusion of omnipresence, our sense of, of infinite wisdom, we can be in all places at the same time, we can know everything, we can keep up with everything. And that’s just not true. So I would, I would encourage people to just sit down and pray about okay, what who are the people that God has placed in my life around me in real life right now, of course, I live, I live far away from my family, I am from Mexico, where I live in Guatemala. So. So we rely a lot on technology to keep in touch. But in any of it, nothing. Nothing is on social media, I can just I just have a group chat with my family. And we do video chats each week. And that’s all I need to be kept on track on what my family is doing. I don’t know. I mean, I don’t need to know what my great aunt ate on Thursday. I don’t know. It’s just unrealistic. So So let’s challenge that illusion that that lie that we need to be on top of whatever our 500 people we’ve ever met are doing. We don’t meet them. And that’s just a burden. I don’t know why we we feel we have to bear.

Sarah Zylstra
I know I was thinking about that today, too. There’s just a pressure of it of sort of like you owe it to somebody or you be letting somebody down or if you weren’t there. But then if you think about that for longer than 30 seconds, and you think what do people notice if I don’t post for a while? I don’t know about you, but nobody notices if I don’t post for a while, like nobody’s looking? Yeah, well, I mean, to be like, where’s your picture, there’s,

Ana Avila
there’s actually a psychology phenomenon that it’s called the spotlight effect, that it’s actually been tested that people feel like they’re at the center of attention all the time, and they’re not scores. And social media just just increases that I don’t know how, how much, how much. So we need to, to be aware of that, that that lie, and we need to be free of it. Because our lives are going to be so much lighter, so much freer. And we are going to be able to actually serve and know and love the people we’re actually around. And we are actually called to serve in love.

Sarah Zylstra
So I was going to ask you this, but maybe you’d say maybe your answers just going to be text them. But I came up with this scenario, I thought like, here’s, here’s my problem that I would have. In your chapter chapter seven. In our book, you talk about using social media as a tool. And I thought that was really helpful. Like, before you go on, be thoughtful about why you’re going to go on and how long you’re going to be on there. So I was thinking if I thought okay, it’s on his birthday, and I want to like publicly honor her and celebrate her and I want to go right Happy Birthday on on as well. What would happen to me is I would log on and I would immediately see the newsfeed at which the top would be something interesting. And I would look at it and I would scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll, and then suddenly I would realize, Hey, I gotta go do something. Why was I even on here in the first place? And I would leave, and then later I would think, Oh, it’s on his birthday. I should go on to Facebook and publicly honor her and the whole cycle would start over again. Like there’s it would just be maybe eventually I could get to write Happy Birthday on your wall, but boy, it would take me a while to get there. How can we? What’s a better way like are there self discipline muscles that we can strengthen? Or would you just say hey, just text that person?

Ana Avila
Well, you said publicly, so the text wouldn’t be public. But I do think there’s a different way we could do things. In the book, I talked about how to use social media as a tool. And the thing is justified is that you should have a plan or purpose on why you’re you are actually using social media and not other tool that could serve the same purpose. So you said, Okay, I want to honor her publicly. I want other people to see how, how much of a blessing she’s been to my life. Okay, you can Great, that’s amazing. You can do that. But you need to put some time into it. You have you need to not just, if if you were like, oh, today’s Anna’s birthday, because Facebook reminded me, it was an iceberg. That’s not using social media as a tool. It’s just It was a coincidence. And then you’re using the excuse of wanting to honor her. Let it let’s imagine where you’re actually buying the the idea that you have to use it as a tool, when then you would have a time to prepare for this because you would know on your calendar, because I know for Sarah, and this case, is a great friend of mine. So I love her and I want to honor her publicly and I have her birthday like reminded on my calendar. I don’t have to rely on Facebook reminding me of another’s random 600 person’s birthdays and the middle of all those people there. Sarah, the woman I love No, no, I have people I’m serving in my church and my community on my calendar, because I really appreciate them and want to congratulate them. So yes, I take my time and my weekly plan because you’re a productive person, and you sit down and plan your weeks. And you look at your calendar, and you see Oh, Sarah’s birthday is coming. So I want to honor her on Facebook, I want people to see how much of a blessing she’s. So I’m gonna prepare, and I’m gonna spend 20 minutes tomorrow night, writing a thoughtful message for Sarah. And then I sit down, I open my notes app on my phone or on my computer. And I draft this beautiful, inspiring message for Sarah. And I look, I even look for a picture of the both of us that I read. I haven’t used Facebook at all for this, okay, I have the birthday on my calendar, I have the note written on whatever app I have to write on my computer on my phone, and I have the the photo on my on my, on my phone or whatever, I can just gather all that up, and then set a reminder on my phone of okay, this is the time to post this on Sarah’s wall. But I know that Facebook sucks my attention as soon as I got I get into so I have this, this little tool that is called the newsfeed Eradicator, which is actually a thing, because there are apps that can eradicate the newsfeed and actually just take you directly to the to the profile of a person. And then you go into there’s profiling, you copy and paste and less than one minute and you post. And that’s

Sarah Zylstra
I didn’t know that you could eradicate your news feed. There’s

Ana Avila
so many there’s so many tools for social media, because people know this is a thing. This is a thing that is taking time away from everyone. So there are very smart people that are building tools that can make us more focused in our uses of social media. So yes,

Sarah Zylstra
you know, that reminds me of like, that’s the early days of, of social media, right? Like that’s the Facebook at the beginning, where if you were curious about someone, you had to go to their page and look at it. And then you had to think of another friend and then go to their page and look at it. Facebook wasn’t serving that to you. You had to go find it.

Ana Avila
Yes. And that’s the reason it changed it because it wasn’t keeping us long enough on Facebook. So that’s when it changed. That’s why now it’s like a never ending platter of yummy, useless information for us.

Sarah Zylstra
That is so interesting. Okay, that’s I love that idea. That kind of breaks it, it’s helpful kind of comes down to like, Okay, if I do want to just keep up with these couple family members, maybe I eradicate my news feed. And then I What, what’s the app called? What do you use to do that?

Ana Avila
I don’t use it personally, because I don’t use Facebook. But if you Google News Feed Eradicator and there’s there are news feed and already caters for you to do I don’t know if that’s the name, but they just wipe all the suggestions and things so you can just like if I need a video on how to cook chicken or whatever, you can just google and you don’t have to go into a chicken rabbit hole because

Sarah Zylstra
that’s true. Nobody wants to do that. I would love to talk with you a little bit about one another thing that you mentioned in your chapter that I thought was excellent was clearly You’re a planner and a time planner. But you talked about how planning your time off social media is just as important as planning your time on social media. And I think that’s crucial for so many of us. Because if we don’t have something going on in our analog life, how quick are we to be like, Oh, what do I do right now? Oh, well, I’ll just check and see what’s going on at Facebook, or Instagram or Twitter or wherever we happen to be looking. Yeah. So what are your How do you do this take us through like, what does that look like?

Ana Avila
Well, in my life, it’s very boring, probably for most people, because I’m a boring person. I love books. I love puzzles. I love walks in the park. So that’s why I do I just have very strict boundaries with social media as if they’re not on my phone. And then I have to find good stuff. Beautiful stuff, fun stuff to fill my time with. And at first, it’s like, because you’re so used to just running to your phone. Whenever you have a down moment. You’re a bit lost on okay, what what do I do, I don’t have anything to do. But then you start thinking and surround yourself with things you enjoy. And, and it’s awesome. And personally, for me, I have a puzzle all the time. I have a puzzle table. That’s how boring how the permanent going puzzle here. works. I have podcasts, I have a park near the house where I just gave to whenever I can. We with the children, you have music, we have board games, we have things to paint, it’s just it sounds even silly. Like oh, yeah, you do puzzles, but it’s just finding ways to actually rest your brain and not fill it with garbage. Because that’s where a lot of our anxiety and our bitterness come from comes from because we are just filling our brain with useless stuff with mind numbing stuff. And then we we got it, we get addicted to it. But when you give yourself the space to just enjoy little things, you’ve you, you start noticing how amazing it is to just relax with a puzzle. And not and of course at first because you’re so used to the to pull this off social media, you’re not actually completely enjoying whatever you set out to do. Because you crave the sugar. It’s like when you go on a diet like we you want to spend less less time consuming sugary treats and processed food, but your body craves it. And when whenever you’re eating, even if it’s something delicious, like a really juicy watermelon, and you can enjoy it fully because you do crave the sugar. But slowly, little by little you start, you start flushing that, that sugar out of yourself. And then your brain starts enjoying the simple and beautiful things of real life and real food. So yeah, that’s what I do. I just have very strict boundaries with social media, I don’t make it an option at all. And I just forced myself to look around, okay, what is going on in real life. And I tried to feel that real life, my house, my room, you know, my phone, because when I’m not on social media, I still have my phone on all the time. But what’s on my phone, they’re crossword puzzles, there’s podcasts, there’s books, there is music. And, of course, I don’t want to be on my phone all the time. But when the phone can be an awesome tool to do good things, too. So I just tried to set the boundaries and surround myself with things I just want to enjoy doing. But the options are just limitless. Everyone has their thing. Some people like cooking, I don’t understand that. But yeah, I respect people who do. So you can cook or you can do sports, or you can fix your car, or you can do whatever you want to do, I think is just taking the intention to step away of those things that are burdening you and surrounding yourself with things that are going to make you flourish.

Sarah Zylstra
I love that. So you consume would you say you consume almost no social media like your I’m picturing you. You’re on social media. I’ve been on your Instagram. It’s beautiful. But you’re constructing all those posts offline and then popping into post them. How do you consume it? Do you ever scroll or how do you how do you consume if you do? Well,

Ana Avila
I consume on Fridays and Saturdays on Instagram. And in various there are days that I just grow like it’s Friday as girl and I just I just I just have the rule of okay after you’re done your most important task of the day or whatever they do. You can scroll, but to be honest, I’ve lost a lot of the taste for it. Because I have I have just said Are these boundaries that I will I always like to tell people, when you make the effort to just step away of social media, you realize how little you miss when you’re far away from social media, but you have to give yourself that space. Because at first, yes, you are fearful of everything you’re missing out. But then you come back and you’re like, Oh, this is what I missed. Okay, guys, yeah, fun. And then you go back and you live your life and you read or you do whatever that actually fills your soul, then you come back, and oh, this is what I missed. Okay, I in now, it’s, I’m not saying I’m immune to it. Of course, there are days that I’m just like, Okay, let’s grow whatever. But most of the time, I’m just like, methylene, this has lost tears, it says, and I am, well, this another topic of brain stewardship, I like to call it I’m actually working on a book about that. But if I want to, to create beautiful and deep, thoughtful things, I need to be taking care of what I consume. So I’m everyday a little bit more aware of the effects of mind numbing, and just doing scrolling and things like that, that I just like, I fear for what it can do to my brain. So I just want to I just want to take care of it. And it sounds silly, but it’s true. It’s true. And in, in I don’t know, I again, the more time you spend away, you realize how little how little how nothing it is, whatever you are missing out compared to what it’s out there. So yeah, I don’t consume much. But yeah, as anyone, I’m just, I just can, I can get lost too. But I limit myself. So I don’t

Sarah Zylstra
I think that’s super interesting. I, because if I looked at your Instagram account, I would assume you were active all the time. Because you have gorgeous stuff on Instagram, and you’re timely with your posts. So it just feels like oh, she’s she’s nailing this, like, that’s what I think when I look at your Instagram like, so great.

Ana Avila
I have a habit tracking app, I’m a habit tracking nut. So I have a, I have a habit of taking three crappy pictures per day. That’s my habit, I have to take three crappy pictures of whatever. So when I get on Instagram, at the end of the week, I have a selection of random pictures of my week. And then I can pick one or two that are halfway decent. And then I post those, but I just make it a habit. And I have like this rhythm of during the week, I try to spend time thinking and yeah, capturing stuffs capturing thoughts. So when I get to the time when I should be there, I have something to offer. And I offer it and I share a little bit of time with my audience. And then I’m off again. And then I’m on again. So that’s like way I do that’s

Sarah Zylstra
so good. Because you know what else you’re doing there is making sure that other people aren’t wasting their time on? Oh,

Ana Avila
yes, yes, that’s very important to me. I always tell people that are on my Instagram page. The goal of this Instagram page is to have you spend less time on Instagram pages. So yes, just go and live your life. Yeah. Because if I would, if I it wouldn’t be very hypocritical. I mean, just being there all the time giving productivity advice, and social media management advice, when I’m posting stories all day, every day, it’s just no,

Sarah Zylstra
that is fascinating. I love that I love the idea of not being a waste of time for other people. So maybe part of you know, when you’re thinking about maybe the advice would be like try and take a smaller break. It’s hard to say to somebody quit cold turkey, but you could say, try and stay off for a week or if you could or a day wherever you’re at. And then be thoughtful about going back on a lot of people. Almost everybody after they take a break and they return just return right to those old habits, probably from lack of planning or thoughtfulness. Like you’re just heading right back in that same swimming pool you were in before without thinking of like, how am I going to get a flotation device this time? So maybe to think about like, what am I doing here? What is the VAT? What’s my value to other people here? There’s so many great, you know, ways that you can be a witness to Jesus or to God’s goodness in your life or the things that he’s teaching you. I think we have a lot to share. But boy, we can just share a lot of dumb stuff, too. That really isn’t enlightening for anybody.

Ana Avila
Yeah, I would. I would just encourage people to take that time to just ask themselves these questions and then come up with with us You guidelines. So you don’t have to ever be asking, should I be here? Or should I not. And even if you don’t have anything specific to post, or you don’t have like, that sort of account that you have, like an audience or whatever, even if it’s just checking in with people, okay, you want to check in, that’s great. But you do decide when, previously before Instagram is luring you, and then notification and everything. So do just have those guide guidelines. And of course, we all are in a journey, we all struggle, so you might, you might sometimes just slip up, but you know, you’re slipping up. That’s the thing you need to be knowledgeable of. Okay, now is the time I use it. Now is the time I don’t use it. I’m using it. So this not okay, what’s happening? Why am I following the guidelines set for myself? Maybe it wasn’t unrealistic, I went, Okay, I need to change it. Or maybe I’m just running away from something I have to do. And those are the questions the reflection that actually helped us grow, instead of just like, oh, no, I shouldn’t be here. Okay. Yeah. Why? Why are you so it’s just not helpful to be guilting yourself into not being on social media. And then you you get tired of guilting yourself, and you’re like, oh, whatever, I’ll just use it. I know, I could never just not use it. So I might as well just use it. So helpful, either.

Sarah Zylstra
I think that’s really good to look, because you’re right, like you can only force yourself into something for so long before you’re gonna give up. Like you just don’t we just can’t run on willpower. Which is just true of the whole Christian life in general, you run on the Spirit of God. So to be praying through some of that of like, Lord, what would do you want me to be here? What would you have for me here? Is it? Is this not the season for me to be on? Or not the platform for me to be on? Just I think you’re right, that a lot more discernment we need about when to be where? And what to say when? Yes. Oh, that’s such good stuff do you feel. So one thing we feel that studies show is we feel like frantic and rushed. A lot of the time, even though we have less stuff to do than say the generation before us had to do just in general life stuff. We have, you know, dishwashers and microwaves and all the appliances that our grandmas didn’t have. And yet we still feel more, more anxiety and and like we don’t have time like they have do you feel now that you’re like, basically, social media minimalist, you feel like more relaxed with your time, how does that feel to you, versus how it was before

Ana Avila
it has helped a lot. But I do believe that rush, we feel to do the next thing and do more and more is sort of a natural, simple tendency of the human heart. It’s very interesting what you said on how the previous generation had less tools to do the amount of things we we have to do as we take care of the home or work or whatever. But I feel that whatever we do, whatever Appliances we get, or whatever tools we set up in place to just try to keep up with everything. If we don’t start from the understanding that we have the time we need to do the things we have to do. We are called to do I love Ephesians 210 I don’t know in English, when in Spanish, throw the good works, that God has prepared for us. That thought that God has prepared good works for me, I don’t have to do every good work, which is there just a limited amount of good work that God has prepared for me and key has given me what I need to accomplish those good works today. That is beautiful, awesome. God is not like okay, I’m not here you have 36 hours of good works to do today, you have to figure it out. Of course, he’s not doing that he just He knows our limits. And one of those limits is our time. And, and but when we run away from those limits, and we want to do more and more and we get at this dishwasher, so we pile up another 10 things to do around the house. And we have this supercomputer that allows us to to do this all these amazing things and people were thinking oh, we’re gonna have like four hour work weeks because we have this amazing tool now we just keep piling and piling and piling the work because our our hearts are just anxious trying to feel our time and our expend our energy and just trying to feel valuable and try to feel useful instead of just resting in God and understanding that we’re limited in our timing or energy in our intelligence and that we can be gladly doing the limited amount of Pinzgau to wants us to do. So. Yeah, social media, like, limiting the use of social media can help us feel less rushed. Because, of course, every time we switch the focus of our attention, its energy spanned. And it’s confusing for us, we’re focusing on one thing, and then we was live for a second. And then we have to come back to that thing. And it’s anxiety producing and getting rid of social media can help with that. But even if we get rid of social media, and we don’t understand this fact that God has prepared good works for us, and we have the time we need to accomplish them, we’re gonna just run through other things. So So I would just encourage people to, to remember the fact that God knows for me to dust, and he knows that, that we we are limited in our time, or energy and everything we are because we’re human. And in those limit, we can honor God. Sometimes it’s going to be on social media, a lot of times whenever we have social media, and that’s amazing. We just need to be praying for wisdom for God to be to be leading us on okay, what should I do today? Should I go on social media for now or should I not. And hopefully, God will give us the wisdom we need to walk and those good works he has prepared for us.

Sarah Zylstra
I think that’s really good. Because there are some times I know, we’ve been kind of hard on social media. But there are, like we said at the beginning, there’s a couple, there are things that you can do on social media that do save you time, you can learn things there. Like you said, you can look up how to cook chicken or instead of, you know, trying to find a person to physically show you or there are ways that it does save us time, and is a good use of time maybe also to connect with friends we never would be able to is also a really good use of time. So there are good, there are good reasons to be there. You’re still there. As long as we’re careful about just being mindful, I think is the main lesson here of just like be thoughtful about what you’re doing. Don’t just if you’re drifting through. Somebody else is gonna grab that decision and make it for you. Yes,

Ana Avila
definitely. Yes. And, and I just want to leave people with with this thought that we can, we can be thoughtful. I don’t know, I feel when I talk to people about this, a lot of them they feel they feel helpless. They’ll feel like, Oh, this is just the way things are. And there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s truly it feels so weird, because there are a lot of people again, a lot of very smart rich people trying to hook us into these things with we are we are we have a well we have agency we can make decisions, we just need to be realistic on on the pole this this things have on us and be honest about how how much do we actually need them in our lives and why and, and try to walk faithfully for the glory of the Lord, and we’re gonna miss out we’re gonna make wrong calls. And we will have to go back and fix things and that’s okay. God will lead us along the way and he will use or even our, or most little littlest of the efforts for His glory. So that’s encouraging for me just knowing that, that God is pleased by this desire of my heart to use social media for his glory, and that he’s going to use everything for my good and and that I don’t have to know everything or have all the right answers. I just can’t walk one step at a time and he’ll be glorified.

Sarah Zylstra
That’s so good. On a thank you so much for talking with me. Today we are talking about our book. And and I wrote both three chapters in social Sandy and Insta world. So thank you for chatting with us. And we will be back with chapter eight. Next time. Thank you. Thank you for having me.