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A Prayer About Wanting to Be Astonished

     Peter knocked at the outer entrance, and a servant girl named Rhoda came to answer the door. When she recognized Peter’s voice, she was so overjoyed she ran back without opening it and exclaimed, “Peter is at the door!””You’re out of your mind,” they told her. When she kept insisting that it was so, they said, “It must be his angel.” But Peter kept on knocking, and when they opened the door and saw him, they were astonished. Acts 12:13-16

     Dear heavenly Father, I want to repeat this story again and again and again. I want my unbelief to be exposed, mocked and deconstructed by your goodness, faithfulness, and power. I want to be astonished at the expense of my own embarrassment and humility. I want to hear Peter knocking at the door while I am praying… as a rebuke to how little I really trust you to be the God who raises the dead. Astonish me, Father, astonish me.

     Things that are impossible with man are possible with you. I’ve been praying about some of those “things” for a long time, with little confidence and decreasing expectation. I confess this as sin. When my commitment to intercession devolves into a delight-less duty… a mechanical ritual… or a rehearsal of my practical agnosticism, you’re robbed of glory, Father. Let me grieve this more than I grieve not getting my prayers answered—how I want them answered and when I want them answered.

     I know intercession isn’t a matter of needing more faith, but more love and trust in the object of my faith—that would be you, Lord Jesus. Jesus, you are mighty to save… faithful to serve… quick to be merciful… so full of grace and truth. Peter’s prison doors were no match for you. Here are a few of the impossible-with-man-things I bring today before your throne of grace today. Make me run with over-joy like Rhoda as you, my resurrected Lord, bring your resurrection power to bear.

     I’m heavy hearted for a few marriages, Jesus. Show your exceeding great power as you bring humility and hope to my friends. Restore… refresh… renew… grant gospel-repentance.

     I’m weary of praying for those who are marked by mental and emotional illnesses. I find myself thinking the gospel has no power to help those who suffer from chemical imbalances and personality disorders. Jesus… astonish me… astonish me. I don’t mind being humbled one bit.

     Where I’ve been deceived, harmed and betrayed… throw open the prison doors of my unforgiveness and hardness of heart. Where I still carry the shame and burden of my own failures and weaknesses… break the power of canceled sin and vain regrets, Lord Jesus. And whatever other prisons I’m in… or put others in… blow down the doors and bring deliverance, Lord Jesus… and much glory to the whole Trinity. Astonish me… so very Amen, I pray, in your faithful and gracious name.

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