Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Psalm 62:5-8
Dear Lord Jesus, it’s such a joy to start this day with the freedom of pouring out my heart to you. I don’t have to sanitize, spin, spiritualize anything. Your welcoming heart… your never-ending mercies… and your sufficient grace are all I need. I praise you for being such an inviting and safe refuge. So here I come…
Today I’m feeling restless, Jesus… not overwhelmed, despairing nor afraid… just plain old restless. I’m having a hard time sitting still… staying present in conversations… and keeping my focus for very long. I’m not sure what all’s going on, but I’m thankful that you do.
Maybe it’s the uncertainties of the next several months. You know how much I hate surprises and love to be in control of everything. Maybe it’s the floating sludge of vain regrets—wishing for a few “do-over’s,” as I second guess some decisions in the past. Maybe it’s the general blahs of knowing that some relationships are simply not going to be fixed before life in the new heaven and new earth.
Maybe it’s the background chatter of the accuser—who loves to fertilize and ferment doubt, shame and dis-ease. Maybe it’s the redemptive discontent of heaven—reminding me that nothing is really enough in this world. Maybe it’s simply time for more exercise, better sleep and good eats. I really don’t know and I really don’t have to know.
But here’s what I DO know. My hope comes from you, Jesus, not from my being in control and nor in my figuring everything out. You are my rest in the restlessness. Nothing really has to change for your peace to rule in my heart. You are my mighty rock in the middle of shifting sands. You are my stable fortress in the world of multiple uncertainties. My salvation and honor depend on you, not on anything in me. I can trust in you at all times, including right now. So very Amen, I pray, Jesus, in your rest-giving name.
