Paul Tripp, What Did You Expect? (Crossway, 2010), pp. 47-48:

Because sin is antisocial, it tends to dehumanize the people in our lives.

No longer are they objects of our willing affection. No, they quit being the people we find joy in loving.

Rather, they get reduced to one of two things.

They are either vehicles to help us get what we want or obstacles in the way of what we want.

When your wife is meeting the demands of your wants, needs, and feelings, you are quite excited about her, and you treat her with affection.

But when she becomes an obstacle in the way of your wants, needs, and feelings, you have a hard time hiding your disappointment, impatience, and irritation.

This is where another eloquent biblical observation comes in. It is that we are kingdom-oriented people. We always live in the service of one of two kingdoms.

We live in service of the small, personal happiness agenda of the kingdom of self, or we live in service of the huge, origin-to-destiny agenda of the kingdom of God.

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9 thoughts on “How Sin Can Dehumanize the People in Our Lives”

  1. Gaye Clark says:

    A great book, that is profoundly convicting to read.
    Paul Tripp nails the heart issues in many marriages today

  2. “Because sin is antisocial”.

    Often it is but not always. This statement is being treated, in error, as an absolute. Satan has a bevy of pro-social programs that are not in concert with the protocol of God.

  3. donsands says:

    Good words. Sin always crouches at the door. yet for the believer Jesus is our Door.
    Satan knocks on the door, and asks to come in, and i let him at times, and yet, there are times by faith in prayer, I simply let the Door answer the knock, and the devil flees.

    “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7

  4. Totally agree with Gaye. This book led to some of the hardest (and best) conversations my wife and I ever had.

    http://differentway4kids.blogspot.com/2011/02/recommended-what-did-you-expect.html

  5. Matt Robison says:

    Lust itself is the great objectifier. And I’m not just talking about the porn industry.

    It also prevents a man from having normal relationships with other women. They are dehumanized. The man’s eyes are covered with a film that prevents true connection.

    This is a good insight.

  6. Bruce Russell says:

    Wow, nice quote.

  7. That is the crux of it. Serving the kingdom of self or the Kingdom of God. Henry Blackaby identifies the same thing in Experiencing God. Oh, that God will grant me the wisdom to always recognize when I am serving the wrong kingdom!

  8. The point about thinking of people as either vehicles or obstacles made me think about how I view God. I often view him as a means to get what I want or as someone way of that.

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Justin Taylor


Justin Taylor is senior vice president and publisher for books at Crossway and blogs at Between Two Worlds. You can follow him on Twitter.

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